Witty Wednesdays - Guide to Etiquette: Driving

This week's comic is the beginning of a series of Etiquette lessons from Yours Truly. Enjoy!

Hindsight - On How to Be Lovely

So, yes, I haven't posted in a while. This week has been pretty crazy - guests, kittens, etc. I'm now completely unsure as to where I will be living starting in February. I may return to San Francisco to continue on-campus studies, or I may remain here in New Orleans until the summer... Everything is up in the air. I've also got finals coming up, followed by Christmas and New Year's. I can't promise to post every day, but I will do my best to post at least twice (if not thrice) a week. Did you like my little inclusion of thrice there? It's one of my favorite obscure words.

Image via Wikipedia

Zemanta Assistant seemed to think this picture was relevant to my article...?

Anyway, today I wanted to share some vintage beauty tips. I find these videos bizarrely fascinating. I guess I'm really just a historical voyeur in that I love catching glimpses of daily life in other time periods. I got the title for this from one of my favorite movies, "Funny Face":





On to the point. I've recently discovered the delights of Glamour Daze - in their own words "An Archive of Vintage Fashion and Beauty". If you haven't had a chance to peruse this blog to head over there and poke around. It's definitely worth it! They also do a series of Youtube uploads of vintage beauty and glamor one-reels. I've posted a few of my favorites below. Enjoy!

Movie Starlet Constance Bennet's Guide to Skin Care - late 30s. I always sleep with my makeup on, don't you?



A "Guide to Glamour" from 1940s stylist Ratherly Stern. I honestly think that teaching young people (not just girls) about good posture and hygiene is important.





And here a beauty series from the 1950s:







Remember, girls: Soda pop and a big gooey sundae do not a balanced diet make!
Nostalgically Yours

Ask a Gentleman I

As I've mentioned a few times since I made over my blog, I've officially offered my advice to anyone who has questions regarding etiquette and manners (Ask a Gentleman) and costumes, sewing, and theater (Ask a Costumer). After looking through my first few responses, I chose the following e-mail from a close friend:

Dear Nostalgically Yours,

My boyfriend's godmother died yesterday (it's okay, she's had terminal cancer for 10 years and just started to fade this year so they knew it was coming) and the funeral is on Friday. I'm not 100% that I'm attending, [her boyfriend] says he doesn't want me to have to go to a funeral while I'm here [...] but anyway, I don't know what to wear! Since I'm here in Europe visiting, I'm very limited on what I have, so I need your opinion.. I was thinking black dress with black leggings, and then I have a grey lace blazer and my green suede heels. They are the only heels I brought so I don't know if they work, but I don't know if flats or my grey suede boots are appropriate? It's pretty traditional here as far as funerals, and [her boyfriend] is wearing a suit, tie, and dress shoes.
I've only been to two funerals and my grandma didn't want any of us wearing black to our grandpa's funeral, and at my friend Alexis' funeral, no one wanted to wear black because it was already sad enough, so I really don't have a lot of experience.. I also have a black high wasted skirt I could wear again with leggings because I don't think showing legs would be appropriate, [...] with a black sweater so I'm not showing my shoulders, and the green heels. That's another option I was thinking about. [...]
His sister is coming here with his dad to get his dad something to wear so I'll ask her what she thinks ([...] she will be able to tell me if i need to be in all black or not). It will most likely me slightly chilly so the blazer would be fine. [...] I'm thinking I will most likely go with the boots but like I said, I will get another opinion from his sister.

Thanks a bunch,
Hopelessly Under-packed

Dear Hopelessly Underpacked:

Whereas even fifty years ago the etiquette for events such as funerals and weddings were clearly marked by your culture and country, today it is extremely difficult to tell exactly what to wear to these sorts of things to avoid offending anyone. This is especially true about funerals - anything involving the death of a loved one is bound to make family members high-strung already, so the last thing we as guests of the funeral party want to do is make a spectacle of ourselves. Luckily there are still some general guidelines one can follow when having to go it alone, or when wardrobe is limited, such as it is in your case.
Your first instinct in terms of modesty are correct. It is inappropriate to show too much skin at a funeral, so if you must resort to wearing something shorter than knee-length, you should at least cover your legs. Shoulders and hair are generally acceptable in most situations, especially during the summer months, but it is important to double-check with the family and/or the location of the religious service to ensure there are no modesty requirements. Though I'm not worried about this with you, "H.U.", I will remind anyone else reading that cleavage is never acceptable at a funeral. Strapless dresses are also generally frowned upon.
Color is an issue that can vary widely. Though this doesn't apply to you, some Eastern cultures wear white to memorial services and funerals. As you mention in your e-mail, color can vary greatly depending on the deceased and his or her family. Though it's generally best to stick to black, grey and white, if a family member gives the okay for other colors, by all means go ahead. For your specific situation, "H.U.", I would nix the green suede pumps in favor of your flats or boots in neutral colors. More conservative crowds will find colorful accessories or bold prints to be disrespectful.
Since we know each other, I have trust in your taste. My only pieces of advice are to keep it covered, keep it simple, and keep in touch with the family.

My condolences,
Nostalgically Yours

The Only Way to Travel

Ladies and Gentlemen, Good afternoon and welcome to Post number 74 headed to Nostalgia and Thoughtfulness. Emergency exits are located in your task bar and in the big red "x" in the upper right hand corner of your window. We ask that you kindly take your seats and make sure that Facebook is safely stowed in another tab or under the seat in front of you. All electronic devices must be turned off at this time, except for the computer or mobile device you are using to read this entry. Thank you, and enjoy the flight.

A century ago, everyday people such as you or I would never dream of sitting in giant metal flying machines, being hurled across the country at thousands of miles per hour. One hundred years ago, the words "airport" and "airline" were almost completely unheard of. In 1910 we could never in a million years have fathomed a situation as unpleasant as the Steven Slater JetBlue incident.

At the dawn of the last century, just before the first world war, the only ways to travel were by train or boat. Neither cars nor planes were considered objects for extended travel. In fact, planes were still just odd scary contraptions that were used in spectacles and air shows. Comfort and safety were unheard of in these early flying machines. It was not until the Great War broke out that planes were seen as viable tools of war and were taken seriously. The twenties saw the beginnings of Air Mail and Air Travel, though passengers came second to the mail cargo. Finally, the Ford Motor Company bought out an aircraft manufacturer in 1925 and began producing 12-passenger "Ford Trimotors", and just like that airline travel was born.

Until the end of World War II, airline travel was successful, but not in any huge scale. Air travel was still relatively dangerous and expensive, so it was reserved only for a select few. The late forties through the seventies were the golden age of Air Travel. This is the same life-span that the Flight Stewardess lived as a sex symbol:





Note the glasses and how the food cart actually fit down the aisle without killing anyone.


This was also the Golden Age of Legroom and Comfort:





Here's another, much longer clip you can skim through. It's another glimpse into a very different time. I really got a kick out of seeing the "modern" communications technology they kept touting throughout the first half of the film:





Not by coincidence, the rise of the airplane saw the end of the golden age of ocean liners. Ships became too slow for Jet age travelers, so more and more they opted for a small sacrifice in comfort for a huge boost in speed. As a result ocean liners were turned mostly into a vacation industry now that the transatlantic crossing could be achieved in a few hours instead of a few days. More on this later. It was also around this time that trains and buses began to suffer huge losses because everyone was taking planes. Naturally it follows that inter-city bus lines began shutting down and the train system was simplified to carry mostly freight. Now, I have nothing against air travel in principle, but pretty soon the airplane literally became the only way to travel... As demand for air travel increased, it killed other modes of transportation, which in turn created more demand for air travel - it had become a vicious cycle which continues to this day.

At the peak of the Jet Age was the Boeing 747 - the Jumbo Jet. These would have been quite a site to behold. Even the steerage accommodations seem more comfortable:





Ironically, this also marked the end of the good old days. The American deregulation of airlines starting in 1978 was what eventually created the modern airline experience. Once economic downturn hit in the 80s, most of the major airlines were bought out by large conglomerate corporations just as a slew of small airlines began emerging thanks to the deregulation. The newer companies couldn't compete with the big money, and were mostly stamped out. More people were flying, and the parent companies wanted to increase their profits, so they had designers fit more and more seats into their planes, including the 747 which is still used today.

So, air travel was getting pretty cramped, no big deal right? Companies have to make a profit off their investments, don't they? It's part of the deal, isn't it? Just wait. There's more.

After the attacks that occurred on September 11th, 2001, security in airports and on aircrafts increased dramatically. Which is completely understandable, considering the circumstances. However, when you have to wait in line for half an hour, take off half your clothing, and throw away half of the contents of your carry-on, the least you could possibly expect from the airline is to be treated like a human being. Now, though, in the wake of the 2008 Economic Collapse, airlines have cut the most basic of services.

My grandmother used her miles to upgrade to First Class on a flight between Bogota, Colombia and Washington, DC. They had no blankets, no pillows, not even a newspaper... in first class!!! Have you noticed that we are no longer "passengers", but are instead "customers"? Listen to the gate attendants next time you're waiting for your flight. They will call you "customers". This is the exact problem with air travel today. Instead of passengers to be treated with respect and dignity, we are customers to given the run-around on an automated voice system when we try to call them.

This customer vs. passenger issue stems from a mindset we were put into in the 1980s - where low prices supersede good value. As long as the price is low, the true value of the item is meaningless. This is the mindset that allows airlines to manipulate us. We think that spending more money for a better product is bad, so we're willing to sit through hell just to get where we have to be. That's how companies make money billions of dollars off of us. They produce to the cheapest possible product to sell at a moderately discounted price and remind us that paying less for something is more important than getting what you pay for. Now, I'm not saying you should go out and splurge on a thousand-dollar ticket for a fully reclining cocoon-seat, but airlines can't make these changes for free. If we want better service we'll have to be willing to pay for it. Luckily, interest seems to be turning toward a new standard of comfort. Check out these commercials for the 2011 Toyta Avalon:







Companies are using these nostalgic memories as a standard for excellence - as they should! The standards of the time were much higher. People believed that comfort and service were just as important as convenience and cost. Today convenience and cost dominate the human psyche, so we have people like Steven Slater and Bonquiqui:




Which of these ladies would you rather have as a flight attendant?




It's kind of strange to think about, but wouldn't you agree that cars are generally more comfortable than airplanes? I recently drove from DC to New Orleans and I did not get the least bit tired of sitting in my Jetta for the two-day journey, whereas two hours on any plane is more than enough to keep your neck in a crick.

Anyway, I hope those commercials are a sign that things are changing. Maybe people are starting to understand that everything shouldn't be about the price. More and more airlines are including options like "Economy Plus" on United Airlines which features more legroom. Basically, the more people buy the slightly more expensive seats, the more legroom people will have in general. You can't expect big companies to do these things themselves. These companies will only make decisions based on bankroll. So, logically, if we as travelers show a demand for better seating and service, and show that we're willing to pay a little more for it, we'll get what we want. The only other answer would be to threaten their bottom line, which is basically impossible since other options are now so limited. If you want to travel you simply can't boycott these airlines... What are you going to do? Take a boat?

Perhaps instead of blaming Slater for his actions directly (though he is responsible), JetBlue and the entire Air Travel community should look inwardly and see that Slater's outburst has its roots in the problems created by the airlines and their parent companies. Perhaps instead of seeking to increase dividends, companies should work to enhance the travel experience. At the same time, if we expect these changes to occur, we must look inwardly and change our mindset to be prepared to pay for what we ask for. After all, the only language these companies speak is money.


Ladies and Gentlemen, we have arrived at the end of this post. We hope that your journey was to your liking and that the next time you need some reading material you'll keep us in mind. Please use caution when clicking the links to older posts in the sidebars, as contents may shift your interests and prevent you from leaving this website. Once again, thank you for flying with us.

Nostalgically Yours

If you enjoyed this post, you might also like reading some posts on old-fashioned travel on David Toms' blog Savoir Faire. Just don't forget to tell him who sent you!

Put on Your Sunday Clothes!

Most of you will recognize this song from "Wall-E", one of my favorite movies. As I explain in my review of "Toy Story 3", a Pixar movie will inevitably make me cry. Today, however, I weep only for the lost traditions of yore.

The song you just watched speaks to the lost western cultural phenomenon of "Sunday Clothes" (you've heard the expression "wear your Sunday best"?), when people would wear their best dresses and suits to Mass on Sunday morning. Obviously, this has its roots in Christian tradition, probably dating as far back as the Sunday "sabbath" in the time of Constantine I. Since the rise of Christianity, those who worked did so Monday-Saturday. Our modern concept of the weekend wasn't nationally accepted in the United until 1940 (Pioneers of the two-day weekend included Henry Ford in 1926). This meant that Sundays were all the more special for people, since it was their only day off. Though the leisure class could afford to dress lavishly on a daily basis, the working classes had only Sunday to look forward to show off a new dress, a new tie, a new hat. Depending on their income, after Mass most people would go out to the park, to the beach, to enjoy some sort of recreation and to further display how swell they looked. The idea of Sunday clothes is about more than just religion, it has to do with a sense of decency and decorum that went out with the Baby Boomers. Nowadays, being well-dressed is optional. People don't blink an eye if a person goes grocery shopping in sweatpants, but even fifty years ago people thought it was important to look well-kept and elegant.

On this vein, in a relatively recent article from the April issue of Southern Living, Valerie Fraser Luesse pines the loss of three classic icons of feminine propriety:

"1. The Easter Dress

We used to start shopping for out Easter dresses before the Valentine's candy was even stale. An Easter dress was your prettiest, dressiest Sunday-go-to-meetin' ensemble of the year. It screamed spring: floaty fabrics in pastel colors; short sleeves, puff sleeves, or no sleeves; store-bought or handmade. Pearls required. and glovesHat and gloves optional after 1960. [...]

2. The Mother's Day Corsage

When I was a kid, if a mother came to church without a corsage from her children, the whole family went on everybody's prayer list. Now almost nobody buys one, and that's a shame. Here's how it works. You choose the flowers for your mother's corsage based on whether her mother is living or dead. If her mother is living, she wears roses or carnations in pink or red. If her mother has crossed over, she wears white or yellow roses or an orchid. Everybody gets baby's breath. It's just the right thing to do.

3. The Hostess Apron

'When you saw my grandmother's mint-green organza apron, you knew some cucumber sandwiches were coming out,' my friend Rebecca says. Back in the day, Southern [and most other American] women wore kitchen aprons, which they actually wiped their hands on while they cooked, and hostess aprons, which adorned and protected their good dresses while they served guests."

I guess my upcoming move to New Orleans really has me thinking about long-gone nostalgia such as this. Southerners have a reputation for being much more old-fashioned than Yanks - and it's really true. a New Yorker sticks out like a sore thumb in the Crescent City. My last visit to NOLA left me completely flabbergasted. I wondered at the courtesy and warmth I encountered wherever I went. I'm excited about getting more in touch with my New Orleans past. My mother and aunt were the seventh generation born there. I'm also glad I inherited my family's Southern sensibilities, which is why I really agree with Ms. Luesse in that it's a crying shame that these and other traditions have been abandoned. Of course, as she also says in her article, certain things are better left in the annals of Good Housekeeping...

However, in our desperate attempt to do away with those things we saw as uncool and old-fashioned, we effectively threw out the baby with the bathwater. The Baby Boomers were so preoccupied with breaking down the establishment that they didn't stop to think about what might be nice to keep around. Eventually we reached today's generation - the new "Silent Generation". Not silent like the first one, because it had been assimilated by World War I, but silent because we're simply not involved in anything outside our Facebook accounts or our television screens.

The good news is that I think things are changing. Artists such as Katy Perry and Christina Aguilera have done a lot to try and modernize the looks of the 30s, 40s, and 50s, making it cool to look retro. Lady Gaga and Laroux are both intensely reviving the 80s. Hopefully this will encourage other young people to examine the lifestyles of days gone by and maybe start picking out and adopting the things that are relevant in the 21st century. This is especially true because I don't know if we've really found our voice as a generation (thus the "silence"), so perhaps in a world saturated with information, we'll begin to combine the past with the future in finding an identity of our own.

Here's Hoping!

Nostalgically Yours

Hat Etiquette

This morning I had a doctor's appointment. I felt like dressing up, so I wore a suit and my straw boater - this was unfortunately before I knew the temperatures were going to hit 80 before 10am... Nevertheless, I think I looked pretty snazzy. My father and I were in the waiting room, and he looked over and mentioned under his breath that I should remove my hat. Quietly, I wondered aloud if a gentleman really needed to remove his hat in what I considered a public place, but removed my hat to please my father.

I was already thinking a lot about headgear when something else hat-related happened. The nurse attending me gave me great praise for wearing my boater, and told me she wished all her patients wore hats regularly. This got me thinking of the legitimacy of wearing hats in the 21st century, and why we as a society choose not to wear them on a daily basis. Even fifty years ago a well-dressed man or woman did not leave the house without a hat. So what had happened?

Millinery and Haberdashery (women's and men's hat making, respectively) were very closely tied to Couture style fashion. With the rise of ready-to-wear in the 1960s, it became "uncool" to wear hats, since they were associated with the "old world of fashion. Nowadays, most people completely overlook the practical aspects of the hat.

Dermatologists agree that prolonged sun exposure speeds up the aging process. Wearing a hat protects not only from that but also from the UVB rays that are linked to skin cancer. Obviously, in winter a hat will keep you warm.

Another overlooked aspect of hat etiquette is the layer it once added to social interaction. In olden days, when a gentleman tipped his hat to a passing female acquaintance, it was not only a means of showing respect for the woman but could also be a subtle flirtation. A woman could flirt right back by playing hard-to-get under a merry widow.

Of course, the fashionable aspects of wearing a hat go without saying. Emily Post was quoted in 1959 as saying: "It is impossible for a hatless woman to be chic."

Well, I can definitely say that I am officially a hat person. My new goal is to collect hats and eventually be able to wear a hat whenever I leave the house. Because of this decision, and because I was still curious as to who was right between my father and myself, I did some research and found several accounts on hat etiquette from reputable sources such as Miss Manners and Amy Vanderbilt.

If I've convinced you that hats are not only healthy but are also a great way to express your sense of style, stick around for a brief lesson in hat etiquette. You'll be able to wear your hat next time without any embarrassing faux-pas! Before I explain hat etiquette, though, it is important to know some hat anatomy:

(A) Brim: This is the part of the hat that extends from the head, shielding you from the sun.

(B) and (C) Crown: This is the part of the hat that generally sits on the head.

(B) Hatband: This term applies both to the sides of the crown and to the decorative band of fabric on the hat.

(C) Tip: This is the top of the crown.

The last thing to know before I start is a little terminology. To don your hat is to put it on your head. To doff your hat is to take it off. Finally, to tip your hat is to grab the brim of the hat and either bow your head, or briefly remove the hat - both as a greeting or sign of respect.

For the Ladies:

Your rules for etiquette are really quite simple. You get to keep your hats on under any circumstances, even for the national anthem. However, if you choose to wear a hat that is considered "unisex" (like a baseball cap) then the rules for a gentleman apply. See below. I hope the above diagram sheds some light as to the "ladies' exception - women's hats traditionally cause more problems when being removed. Thus, she is never required to take it off.

For the Gentlemen:

Your rules are much more complicated, so if you want to know all the dirty little details I've provided a link in the sidebar. I'm just going to cover some basics here. Generally speaking, if you're outdoors or in a public place (such as a lobby or waiting room), your hat should stay on. When passing a lady outside, a gentleman need only tip his hat if he addresses the lady to say such things as "good morning", "hello", or "excuse me". When indoors, a gentleman always removes his hat, especially in the presence of a lady. Also, indoors or out, a gentleman always removes his hat for his or any national anthem.

I'm sure some of you are thinking that these are a bunch of boorish, outdated social conventions that went out with corsets and chaperoned dates. I'm sure some of your are wondering why hat etiquette should matter. I'll tell you. I think hat etiquette is important because it shows people that we care about and respect them. For you male readers, it's a great excuse to get complimented and catch someone's eye. For a lady hats can be flirtatious and provocative. Plus, learning manners where hats are concerned is a gateways to better manners all around... and couldn't the world use a bit more courtesy and kindness?

Nostalgically Yours